


Brian's Bunny Hunt

by Tagsit



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Easter, Humor, M/M, Romance, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-03
Updated: 2015-04-03
Packaged: 2018-03-21 02:55:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3674793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tagsit/pseuds/Tagsit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Justin knows that Brian didn't get to do a lot of the things other kids usually do around holiday times. So, he decides to show Mr. Kinney just how much fun an Easter Egg Hunt can be - only he has to make this particular scavenger hunt Kinney-approved which means it will have to be a little more naughty and somewhat kinkier than what you'd normally expect. Set sometime after 513 when the boys are living at Britin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Brian's Bunny Hunt

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

 

Brian’s Bunny Hunt.

by Tagsit

 

"A little bunny told me that the Great Brian Kinney had never been on an Easter Egg Hunt. We're going to change that right now. You don't get to object, roll your eyes or whine. This bunny hunt is 100% Kinney approved - trust me! So, pick up your basket, Candyman, and follow the bunny trail to find all your Easter surprises!"

 

Brian groaned loudly as he read the note that was tied artistically with a pastel pink ribbon to the handle of the big white-painted wicker basket he'd found on the pillow next to him when he woke. He'd much rather have found a toasty warm blond boy on his pillow. Justin knew that Brian Kinney didn't do ridiculous over-commercialized holidays. What the hell was the boy thinking?

 

An Easter Egg Hunt?

 

'Yeah, right! Maybe next year - if I happen to grow a pussy! Sorry Sunshine, not interested,' Brian thought with a sneer as he rolled away from the detested basket, throwing the blankets off and directing his bare ass towards the shower rather than out on some wild goose chase.

 

Brian hadn't taken more than two steps though before he stepped on something that squished under his heel. He lifted his foot up to see what the hell he'd stepped on, but there was nothing on the floorboard. With a disgusted feeling in his gut he lifted his foot higher and twisted his ankle to the side so he could see the bottom of his foot.

 

To Brian's utter horror, there, on the pad of his right heel, was a gooey blob of purple gunk.

 

What the fuck! Why was there some sticky gooey blob of purple on his floor? Brian reached down with revulsion and peeled the purple mass off his foot with his index finger and thumb, trying hard not to touch whatever it was more than absolutely necessary. He brought the gross blob of purple goo up closer to his face so he could examine it and was appalled to find that it smelled overwhelmingly of that fake grape flavor they always put in kids' foods. He tried to shake it off but the sticky mass stayed stuck to his thumb. Brian shuddered as he turned towards the bathroom, intent on washing whatever it was off and then disinfecting his skin with alcohol wash.

 

Unfortunately, Brian hadn't even taken two steps before he again felt the same gooey, squishy feeling under the toes of his other foot. "What the FUCK!" Brian yelled out with disgust.  He wiggled his toes and dislodged another blob of goo, this one a bright pink color, which skittered a few inches away as soon as it became unstuck. As he followed this blob’s line of flight, Brian saw that there was another unknown, brightly colored roundish thing just beyond where the second one had landed. And, another beyond that.

 

He cautiously followed the trail of gooey balls around the foot of the bed and saw a longer line of the little round colorful gooballs heading out through the open doorway of the bedroom. Looking more closely at the purple blob still glued to his finger, Brian realized it was some type of candy thing that he thought he’d seen Gus eating one time. He sniffed it again cautiously. It was definitely grape smelling and sugary and  . . . .  not supposed to be on the floor of his bedroom.

 

“Justin!” Brian bellowed, without really expecting a response though. Brian knew that when Justin wanted to ‘surprise’ him, he was going to be surprised whether he liked it or not. The little blond devil wasn’t likely to turn up at his call just to let Brian ruin his surprise. He vowed that he would find the little twat though, and then he would definitely have to punish him for this unacceptable behavior.

 

“Goddamn it. . . .” Brian muttered as he grabbed the abhorrent Easter basket off the bed and used it to hold all the icky candy things as he picked them up before more of them got stepped on and ground into his perfectly polished oak wood floors.

 

Outside the bedroom door, the trail of jelly beans led off to the left towards the top of the stairway. Brian scooped up the offensive candies as he walked, getting more and more annoyed with every step he took. The last ‘bean’ in his direct line of sight was perched on the edge of the top step. Brian bent over to pick it up and saw that there was something substantially larger hidden on the riser of the first step down the staircase.

 

On the far left hand side of the step, nestled in a bed of bright green raffia ‘grass’, there was a gift box wrapped in a colorful pastel purple ribbon. Brian reluctantly picked up the box and pulled off the yards and yards of too-bright ribbon to reveal his first ‘Easter Surprise’. When he finally saw what the box contained - an assortment of liquor filled chocolates, including his favorite Jim Beam scotch - Brian thought grudgingly that maybe this Easter Egg hunt might be Kinney-approved after all.

 

 

There was a note on purple pastel paper taped to the plastic top of the box. Brian pulled it off and unfolded the small scrap of paper. Inside, in Justin’s messy scrawling handwriting, it said, ‘For persistent Easter Morning Grumpiness, Dr. Bunny recommends two of these before you continue your search. Don’t worry, I’ll help you work off the extra carbs later, Stud-bunny!’

 

“Stud-bunny . . . Stud-bunny? I’m going to pretend I didn’t fucking just read that, Sunshine,” Brian yelled down the stairs, complaining at the top of his lungs for form’s sake at the despicable pet name. But, while his voice sounded angry, there was still a slight curling at the corners of his mouth that might almost be described as the beginnings of a smile if there had been anyone around to notice it. Luckily for Brian’s reputation, the house seemed completely empty. Brian popped the top off the box of chocolates and dumped a few of the miniature foil wrapped chocolate bottles into his collection basket. He unwrapped one and bit the top off the candy bottle, letting the smooth scotch inside drain into his mouth, enjoying the burnt caramel  flavor mixing with the dark chocolate as the liquid burned along the back of of his throat.

 

Beyond the nest of chocolates, there was a new trail of jelly beans descending down the stairs. Brian followed, cleaning up the offensive candy blobs as he went. After the shot of whiskey though, he was now following along the bean trail in a slightly better mood than he’d been in previously.

 

At the bottom of the stairs, tied to the newel post of the stair railing, there was a cord that stretched off into the distance towards the kitchen. At regular intervals along the cord, his little bunny boy had attached a series of colorful pastel condoms with clothespins, creating a very festive springtime colored garland that took up the trail where the jelly beans left off.  The cord was looped around various doorknobs and strategically placed furniture leading from the bottom of the stairs through the kitchen door.

  
  


 

Inside the kitchen, the cord soared up to wind around the overhead wrought iron pot rack and then disappeared down into their large stainless steel pasta pot which was resting in the middle of the stove top. The pot itself was overflowing with more of the pastel colored condoms, these ones still in their packaging. Lodged on the top of the brilliantly colorful pot full of rubbers, there was another little note card - this one a bright springtime yellow.

 

The message this time read: ‘Chef Bunny has been busy cooking up some eggs-traordinary fun for you, my hot little Bunbun.’

 

“Enough with the cutesy nicknames, Sunshine”, Brian complained aloud, utterly affronted at being called ‘Bunbun’ by anyone regardless of how cute the little twink thought he was being.

 

The bunny bean trail, at this point, was thankfully supplanted by a pathway of more of the wrapped pastel condoms which cascaded off the edge of the stove and led across the tile floor through the doorway into the dining room. By this point, Brian was wondering how many gross of these pastel condoms Justin planned to go through. He didn’t really want a lifetime supply of pastel rubbers. Plain old latex white was just fine with him, thank you very much.

 

Brian was a little worried about what he’d find in the dining room by this point. Apparently Justin had let his little blond brain loose and set his sexual creativity free. Brian’s lover was notoriously creative in bed as it was. And, while Brian was as open to new ideas as anyone, he really didn’t think Justin needed an excuse to get more imaginative in the bedroom. Who the fuck knew Easter was such an erotic holiday? Nonetheless, Brian couldn’t help taking a peek.

 

The dining table was set with their formal china (a non-wedding gift from Jennifer at the time of their cancelled wedding a couple years ago) and sparkling crystal stemware atop a vivid pastel green tablecloth. In the center of the table was an enormous silver serving platter covered with a domed lid. Seeing as the trail of condoms led to the platter, Brian assumed that his next ‘surprise’ would be found there. He cringed slightly as he gingerly lifted up the lid.

 

Snuggled amid an abundance of more raffia grass, the platter displayed a smorgasbord of edible flavored lubricants. A quick glimpse of the offerings showed ‘cookies ‘n cream’, ‘tropical fruit punch’, ‘seductive strawberry’, ‘cool mint’, ‘bubblegum’ and, Brian’s particular pick, ‘passion cherry’ flavors. The note in the center of this display was a neon orange.  
  


 

‘Sweets for my Sweetcheeks. Keep following the bunny trail to find some intriguing ideas on how to use these toothsome treats,’ was the message the blond twat thought appropriate for this little treasure. Brian was determined now to punish his little wordsmith severely for the series of really horrid nicknames he was throwing around this morning. But, he’d have to find the twat first, so he set off following along a new path of little foil covered chocolate eggs towards his next clue.

 

The route now led out of the dining room and down the hallway towards the media room. Brian wasn’t bothering any longer to pick up the candies along the trail - he would make Justin take care of that little chore once he’d found him and suitably punished him for this little escapade.

 

Not stooping down every couple of feet had the added benefit of hurrying this scavenger hunt along. It only took Brian a minute or two to follow this segment of the path which led him to a nest of what appeared to be be tissues taking up the whole seat of one of his favorite black leather recliners.

 

Digging through the pile of kleenex, Brian laughed aloud when he discovered a wicker basket full of a dozen Tenga eggs buried in the mess. He picked up a couple to peruse and saw that he’d been given an assortment of different textured eggs - everything from ‘wavy’ to ‘silky’ to something called ‘The spider’. Not that he’d ever needed the assistance of any masturbation aides, but Brian had to admit that these little gems looked interesting. He was particularly intrigued by the one labeled ‘The Twister’.

 

The green note card in the basket this time read, ‘In case I’m not handy, these should help you get your rocks off, Sugarlumps. . . Of course, I’m almost always ‘handy’, as you well know.’

 

“After all this you better be handy, Sunshine,” was Brian’s only comment as he quickly abandoned his basket full of half-smashed jellybeans, chocolates and condoms in the interest of speed.

 

This bunny hunt was turning out to be much more provocative than he'd expected. Brian was getting eager to find the end of the trail, which he hoped would lead to his own blond bunny boy who could help him try out some of his new presents. The selection of surprises had definitely perked his interest, clearly evidenced by the half-hard cock which was now pointing his way down the path after being stimulated by the mere thought of the Tenga eggs. He didn’t want anything slowing down his continued pursuit of his bunny instigator. The only thing Brian wanted now was to find the end of this damn hunt and locate his most tempting prize - Justin’s sweet, tight little tush - which was clearly forfeit now due to the excited state he’d managed to get Brian into with all his special, suggestive Easter toys.

 

Brian’s now stiff, still naked cock, led the way from the dining table out through the far door. On the polished hardwood floor there was a line of what appeared to small mottled rocks. Brian swiftly bent to pick one up, wondering offhandedly why Justin had bothered to leave a bunch of brightly painted rocks all over their home. The ‘rock’ seemed oddly light and definitely not a rock-like texture. When he managed to break one open easily with his fingers he was surprised for a moment until he figured out the ‘rocks’ were made of painted candy-coated chocolate. Brian unthinkingly popped the rock into his mouth and hurried on his way out of the room.

 

The path of chocolate rocks trailed down the hallway into the living room. Sitting in the center of the Mies van der Rohe coffee table was a small square box wrapped in shiny pink foil paper with a paler pink silk ribbon adorning the top. There was a small yellow gift tag attached that read only, 'To my Jellybean, love from Mr. Peeps.' Brian picked up the box and shook it gently, intrigued by the rattling noises his actions caused. With a gleam in his eye that belied his usual reserved demeanor, the man pulled off the ribbon and enthusiastically tore off the wrapping paper like a child attacking his presents on Christmas morning. Hiding inside, amid copious quantities of pink tissue paper was a small, bright green, oblong gadget of some kind with a key chain type hook at one end.

  
  


There were a few buttons on the little device, each with a symbol etched into the top of the metal. It was obviously a remote control for something, but what it controlled and what exactly Brian was supposed to do with it, wasn't spelled out. The delightful possibilities as to what toys this might work with flooded Brian's dirty mind and brought out a patented Kinney leer.

 

'What the hell,' Brian thought, shrugging his shoulders as he deliberately pushed the largest button just to see what would happen. 


End file.
